Not As Dead As We Used To Be, by The Beautiful Exchange

Not As Dead As We Used To Be

by The Beautiful Exchange

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Eco-wallet with 8 panel booklet. Layout designed by Jeff Craver. Original photographs of the band members taken by Rachel Matthews.

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1.	Worse For Wear 03:45	lyrics	buy track
I have spent enough of my life living in enmity This spiral of rage hauling my soul to the black I carry this load on my shoulders It's crushing me Spare me the anguish Spare me the agony Rise from the flames Deliver me from the smolder Free from the pain Carry my soul back to the light The chains that I wore I had locked in my own wrists A product of my own delusion My perception of happiness Branded by selfishness Strengthening the bars on my self-loathing cage "They don't care" I lied to myself "Worse for wear" was the title I claimed How can I be rid of this affliction of hatred I've created? Deliver me from my own warfare Shield me from this self-inflicted rage All I have made Comes to an end As I purge this filth from my veins Tear down this wall Destroy it all Father save me from my dismay Rise from the flames Deliver me from the smolder Free from the pain Carry me heart back to the light Deliver me from my own warfare Shield me from this self inflicted rage No amount of war, blood, or tears Will ever bring me to hate Ever again "Worse for wear" never again I will die for love before living in hate
2.	Iéri 03:42	lyrics	buy track
Recollecting all the damage dealt I long to reopen the scars and regret it with every bone in my body The voices, they're calling me back Back into the dark I know so well Turn back time, take control I stand here static Eyes locked on the only time and space that I truly know What’s all around me It’s fading quickly as the day turns to night Be consumed Dwell in me May you never rest May you never sleep Take it all in Every morning I wake I'm back in yesterday All the progress I've made has been erased It's so easy to stay In a world stuck on replay But I will find strength to say I'm done with yesterday My knees are buckling What is this pain I feel? Am I letting go? Or am I giving in? My hands are reaching out Is this the end I see They’re getting louder Silence the voices Is there someone out there? Give me the sight to what's around me Every morning I wake I'm back in yesterday All the progress I've made has been erased It's so easy to stay In a world stuck on replay But I will find strength to say I'm done with yesterday I stand here static Eyes locked on the only time and space I truly know
3.	Regards 03:20	lyrics	buy track
It pains my heart to think that you haven't moved on I thought that everything we've been through gave you a will to be strong It's no wonder my love is all that you wish You wear the past like scales over your eyelids I can't be the person that you want me to be You were never the person I thought you would turn out to be This isn't how I wanted to say it If you want the truth I swear that you’re going to get it This isn't how I wanted to say it I'm only happy when I'm not with you These thoughts can be so hard to translate So forgive me if my words get lost along the way You broke my trust And I've said goodbye enough times for the both of us I wish you well I wish you well Looking back this isn’t how I wanted us to be I wish you well I wish you well I never meant to be your enemy Never meant to be your enemy Don't come searching for the person that I used to be Now it's clear to see I'm better off without you You're better off without me You will get over this heart ache
4.	Contradiction 04:44	lyrics	buy track
This is a contradiction All the words you are saying We all know you are faking it So is it fact or just fiction? I've heard you talk about changing All I see is more waiting I know you are better than this So tell me you're the same person I know you are better than this As you are behind the curtains I know you are better than this This isn't who you are I can see past your scars You've broken trust, my friend But I won't let you fail again I can’t watch you wander without meaning You’ve broken trust, my friend But I won’t let you fail again You tell yourself that tomorrow you'll be different But you're not taking the steps to move closer Don't turn away the grace you've been given Every breath is a chance to start over You're living a lie This is a contradiction This isn't who you are I can see past your scars You've broken trust, my friend But I won't let you fail again I can’t watch you wander without meaning You’ve broken trust, my friend But I won’t let you fail again Now is the time to live this out When was the last time that you felt proud Now is the time to end this pain You can't stay here forever You must make a change You tell yourself that tomorrow you'll be different But you're not taking the steps to move closer Don't turn away the grace You've been given Every breath is a chance to start over
5.	Damaged 03:58	lyrics	buy track
We're all damaged No one is left without scars We're all beaten and bruised At the root it's who we are Everybody has a darkness to hide But the deepest wounds are only healed in the light We're all damaged From the moment conceived No it's not by our choice It's in the blood that we bleed Everybody has a darkness to hide But the deepest wounds are only healed in the light Everyday you stitch yourself together Threading the needle in and out of your flesh You mask all the sins that won't stop bleeding So I cannot see your body stained with red You live your life with your faith in the stitches Perfecting the art of letting no one else see What you become when your wounds are opened And your sin reveals what's underneath The very thing you thought would heal you has now infected your life You and I both know that these stitches will not last forever Hiding them until you rip apart isn’t any better Expose the unseen Bring it to the light I can see who you really are Don't be ashamed You're not alone Just open up your eyes And realize that we're all damaged I will open my wounds If you open your wounds Will you listen when I say That I am exactly like you I will show you my blood So won't you show me your blood Pull the stitches and you'll see I am no judge
6.	Azi 04:19	lyrics	buy track
Crawling out of the constant unrest while the dirt filled my lungs I dared not look back in fear I might regress into the former, into the black The mass is clearing into a new sight I can't help but resist to change Will I stand and win this fight? Will I stand Win this fight Something is pulling me up This is not my doing Have I received death’s cup Or is it the control I'm losing? This is not my doing I've lost all control of it all Crawling out of the constant unrest while the dirt filled my lungs I dared not look back in fear I might regress into the former, into the black The mass is clearing into a new sight I can't help but resist to change Will I stand and win this fight? This is not the end I'm just getting started Set in motion and my body departed I survey who I was and count it as garbage Will I stand and win this fight Or will I look back as my heart turns to stone And allow my spirit to be overthrown? I’ve taken on so much to reach this place Every step I couldn’t take You never left me to decay As I look into Your eyes I know today is in my sight Your ways are all beyond my understanding There's no reason to wait Let it go Release your grip Be free Let it go Release your grip Be free
7.	Aftermath 04:17	lyrics	buy track
Angry at the world This is the aftermath I lit the flame and threw the match Time after time life takes without giving My heart has turned to stone This is how it feels to have nothing left All of my efforts are now in vain When all is said and done I'm broken and bitter and hate my own name This is how it feels to have nothing left This is how it feels to hate yourself God give me strength to find my way back home I'll take the blame for the way I turned out in the end I promised change but I stayed the same This isn't what I meant Angry at the world This is the aftermath I lit the flame and threw the match Time after time life takes without giving My heart has turned to stone Pushing away those who are close to me Blaming God for all my sufferings Hating myself so passionately Loneliness has become therapy I'll take the blame for the way I turned out in the end I promised change but I stayed the same This isn't what I meant If I could change one thing about myself I would change the way I see the world God, all I want is to love who I am And be content with the way I see the world I'll burn down every thought That takes me to that hell Through the depression and the hatred I won't rest until I'm standing on the ashes I'll burn down every thought until I'm standing on the ashes
8.	Abandoned 03:59	lyrics	buy track
Take me where we used to be This apparition is haunting me Remove the surface Remove the surface Remember we were intimate Now this pitiful relationship Is far from perfect Far from perfect Why do I run from you? Why do you hide from me? You've supplied the clothes on my back and sustenance when I was hungry Everything that I ever had I know I have because you love me Understand me when I say I appreciate all that you’ve done for me The burden of raising me on your own Takes you away from this family Why do I run from you? Why do you hide from me? Haunted by adolescence I struggle to find and know myself And I can't help but wonder if it's because of you You've become an apparition Like a ghost or a part of my imagination Remove the surface Remove the surface Remember we were intimate Now this pitiful relationship Is far from perfect Far from perfect Father, help me be a better son I don't expect more from your hands All I want is your hands in mine
9.	Deadicated 04:05	lyrics	buy track
Lead me to my execution Remove me from myself May I never go back to the vacant life I had when I was dead I see the life You have laid before me Full of sacrifice, full of pain Help me dismiss the things that hold me back From imitating the life of a perfect man I can only embrace my failures And hold onto Your abounding grace You never promised the absence of hardship Dying to myself Peeling off my flesh I won't be content until the life I used to live is put to rest You have called my name My only choice is to follow You I'm longing for all that's true Come resurrect this life up from the earth This calling to follow You Will always be a task of endless work I lay dethroned Unworthy is my name You've put a fire in my eyes But I still need you to light the way Come light the way Lead me to my execution You are the fire in my eyes How could You every be denied? Lead me to my execution I am crawling by Your side You are the only way to life
10.	Mâine 03:03	lyrics	buy track
What will become of me? When will my thoughts be free? How can I trust myself when I'm a slave to uncertainty? Clarity Clarity gives way to anxiety Tomorrow will break my sovereignty You will become like me There will be growth in your suffering My hands are open wide Won't you see that I'm right here for you? Here with you How can I trust You When I can't see You? How can I see You When I don't have faith in You? Who holds control of my fear? Who holds the setting sun? How can I trust You? How can I see You? What will become of me? Trust me What if all I love is taken away? Trust me What if I let go and I am betrayed? Trust me Who are you to intervene in my ways? Trust me What will become of me in the end?

about

"Not As Dead as We Used To Be" is the debut full-length album from Dallas based metalcore band, The Beautiful Exchange. The 10 songs of sheer honestly and carefully calculated musicality make for gripping record that'll keep you banging your head from start to finish. From the ruthless and aggressive "Regards" to the melodic and dynamic "Azi," this album is a must have for fans of August Burns Red, Texas In July, For Today, and other similar metalcore acts.

Lyric video for "Damaged" : www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7Wh_Nol93Y

www.facebook.com/thebeautifulexchange

Album available on Spotify, iTunes and just about any other streaming service.

Hard copies available soon!

credits

released December 22, 2017

The Beautiful Exchange is

Gabe Rivas / Vocals
Garrett Thomas / Guitar
Tommy Dickinson / Bass, Vocals
Jeremiah Barnor / Drums
John Wesley / Guitar
Production, Engineering and Mixing / Sam Striker at Native Darkness Productions
Mastering / Troy Glessner at Spectre Mastering
Additional Programming / Hunter Shaw at Native Darkness Productions
Album art, layout and band logo / Jeff Craver
Drum tech / Michael Osborn
Gang vocals on track 9 / Gabe Rivas, Sam Striker, Jake Potter, Michael Osborn, John Wesley

All Guitars and Bass performed by Garrett Thomas
All songs written by The Beautiful Exchange
All lyrics written by Gabe Rivas and Tommy Dickinson

The Beautiful Exchange would like to thank: Sam Striker and Hunter Shaw of Native Darkness, Michael Osborn for drum tech help, Luke Weeks, Troy Glessner, Jake Potter for his burly gang vocal attribution, Jeff Craver, Josh Dorsey, McDonalds, all of our families and new friends we’ve made at shows, thank you for all of your support for this album.